So last year I showed up to a Halloween party dressed as Will Smith. And apparently I’m not allowed to wear blackface. So this really got me pondering about the world. Consider I can’t wear blackface? What other faces should people be banned from wearing? After many tiresome nights staring at the ceiling, the answer became clear… Fat face and dwarf face should be made illegal.
Obese people and dwarves are physically impaired from working in most industries. Media is however an industry they can participate in due to the lesser physical requirements. It therefore seems outrageous that we have their roles being substituted by normal sized people. Special effects and fat suits have enabled this cultural genocide. So I’m here to throw my weight around and stick up for the little guy.
When was the last time you saw a genuine fat person play a major character in a movie? How about a dwarf? Tom Hanks won awards for wearing a fat suit and playing Elvis’ manager in 2022. And all of the dwarves in an upcoming Snow White movie will be CGI. The last time there was a famous dwarf on screen was Peter Dinklage in Game of Thrones, whom is someone that actively protests against having dwarves in movies.
Remember Wee Man from Jackass, Tony Cox from Bad Santa, Verne Troyer from Austin Powers and Warwick Davis from Willow? There was a decade or so of talent that should be declared as the ‘Era of Dwarves’. Now we live in a time where anyone can play a dwarf, even myself – for reference I am a 7ft jacked stallion. The same applies for the obese: I think of the enormous talent from John Candy, Chris Farley and even Jonah Hill. Using today’s methods, all these guys could be replaced by average Joes.
It’s kind of ironic that as we claim to be in a more progressive and accepting society we seem to be excluding opportunities for the abnormal. I guess the price of equality means everyone becomes both normal and abnormal. Any talent or physical difference you possess can be simply replaced by CGI. How fun.
